04-20-2021, 09:12 AM
Dateline Monday April 19.
As to my original post, at the time, all I knew was "I have to write this @#!!! phrase!" The end of it? I don't know maybe I was just wore slap out.
To me it conveys the intensity of the state of my being during an extreme event.
I guess that's why the chronic tinnitus in my left ear doesn't bother me. If there's a connection between my last two sentences, I'll be damned if I know what it....."oh okay, thank yew!". It could be some time before the answer filters up into my consciousness. Sometimes the message is filtered right quick and sometimes it gets highjacked* but, a day or two is about right.
Okay, now it's Tuesday April 20th. Today is Donald Trump's...no sorry, that would be Adolf Hitler's birthday. Y'all should know, I spent dang near four decades studying that period, at times with great intensity, my conclusion is "the Bankers did it". I watch WW2 documentaries to nitpick the inaccuracies, although not so much anymore...meh.
I often refer to the different aspects of my character as separate voices, I suppose in a metaphorical sense because I know that ultimately, they are all me. They are often at odds. Some are immature which makes me posit that with each childhood trauma, a little bit broke off and hid. Here's what I saw the last time I meditated;
a nursery in a dungeon (think, Errol Flynn movie set) in it there are children up to 3 years old, there are grown ups (generic) who are busy keeping them quiet. I have to reclaim those little ones. It may not make sense to you but, I know exactly what is going on and what must be done. I'll go walk the maze where, hopefully Jesus will teach me something about how to use the tool kit his Daddy gave me.
*highjacked mmm...I'm still fleshing that one out basically, I noticed that some things get rerouted. Not satisfactory but, it's the best I got right now. I'm aware of it which, is about like a bandaid but, it will have to do for now. I have a lot of stuff going on and, a limited amount of time to get it right enough.
So, I ask that you take this info and pray on it. He has a plan that requires me to go through the wringer before I'm in a position to be useful. It does feel like I'm doing trapeze without a net, a very kinetic time.
The Lord says that "He ain't gonna put no more on you than you can bear so, you gotta keep on keeping on" thank yeeewww Grandma for all your sage advice.
As to my original post, at the time, all I knew was "I have to write this @#!!! phrase!" The end of it? I don't know maybe I was just wore slap out.
To me it conveys the intensity of the state of my being during an extreme event.
I guess that's why the chronic tinnitus in my left ear doesn't bother me. If there's a connection between my last two sentences, I'll be damned if I know what it....."oh okay, thank yew!". It could be some time before the answer filters up into my consciousness. Sometimes the message is filtered right quick and sometimes it gets highjacked* but, a day or two is about right.
Okay, now it's Tuesday April 20th. Today is Donald Trump's...no sorry, that would be Adolf Hitler's birthday. Y'all should know, I spent dang near four decades studying that period, at times with great intensity, my conclusion is "the Bankers did it". I watch WW2 documentaries to nitpick the inaccuracies, although not so much anymore...meh.
I often refer to the different aspects of my character as separate voices, I suppose in a metaphorical sense because I know that ultimately, they are all me. They are often at odds. Some are immature which makes me posit that with each childhood trauma, a little bit broke off and hid. Here's what I saw the last time I meditated;
a nursery in a dungeon (think, Errol Flynn movie set) in it there are children up to 3 years old, there are grown ups (generic) who are busy keeping them quiet. I have to reclaim those little ones. It may not make sense to you but, I know exactly what is going on and what must be done. I'll go walk the maze where, hopefully Jesus will teach me something about how to use the tool kit his Daddy gave me.
*highjacked mmm...I'm still fleshing that one out basically, I noticed that some things get rerouted. Not satisfactory but, it's the best I got right now. I'm aware of it which, is about like a bandaid but, it will have to do for now. I have a lot of stuff going on and, a limited amount of time to get it right enough.
So, I ask that you take this info and pray on it. He has a plan that requires me to go through the wringer before I'm in a position to be useful. It does feel like I'm doing trapeze without a net, a very kinetic time.
The Lord says that "He ain't gonna put no more on you than you can bear so, you gotta keep on keeping on" thank yeeewww Grandma for all your sage advice.