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+--- Thread: Rehoming (/thread-1291.html)
Rehoming - Ed Hurst - 06-14-2023
We knew long ago that we couldn't stay in our apartment forever. The calling and mission would eventually move us to another kind of residence. But we didn't have anything concrete, just a vague sense we were getting close.
It sprang us rather suddenly last week. My son asked us if we would consider merging our financial resources to buy a house big enough for all of us to share. Not a mobile home, like the last time, but a regular house. We have no illusion about how challenging it will be, but the alternatives for all of us are far worse. Pray with us; here are the concerns we see:
1. Short time frame. Our lease comes up in August. Their situation may be even shorter.
2. Financing, of course. It's one thing to have enough income for the payments, but there are more costs before you even make that first payment. In our favor is that my VA home loan privileges still cover us for a decent amount in our local market.
3. Location. My daughter-in-law is pushing to stay in their current school district (Choctaw, OK). My wife needs to stay near her employer, the Mid-Del School District. While those two are adjacent, it does limit our choices trying to stay close to that shared boundary.
4. Size. It has to be big enough to accommodate all of us, and four cars, etc. The honest truth is that I'm willing to do without a computer office, but not my server. There are too many reasons both families need computers for different work purposes, so four bedrooms is the minimum, and five is a lot better. They have three daughters, and one is a teen.
Regardless, you can count on me to move forward with all my current ministry and projects, even if I have to sit with a laptop in the library.
RE: Rehoming - forrealone - 06-14-2023
Wow! That's a big deal... every aspect of it and then the ones that will come up after and if you find a suitable place and move in together.
I have a two car carport that I wanted to convert to a garage with an 800 Sq ft apartment above it with access to it only from inside the house. I figured two bedrooms and then an open room for living and dining. We wouldn't need a kitchen and i'm not sure about a bathroom though it would be nice. That might require a bigger septic tank so I don't know.
This came up when my daughter and I considered merging our homes by her selling hers which would give us enough money to do the expansion. I would move into the apartment. And she and the two youngest ones would move into the house. The oldest graduated from high school last week. She might stay in that apartment also.
However some of the memories my daughter has from the home I live in and that she grew up her high school years in leave her with a bad taste in her mouth.
But then you have to consider all the other aspects. They have four cats. They make a lot of noise. And there are a lot of other considerations.. But if it would help us all in the long run, we would figure it out.
I just shared all that just so you know that I can relate. I will definitely be lifting all of this up to the Lord in my prayer time. May He provide for you not only a place that would be suitable but also one that will be easily afforded.
God bless!
RE: Rehoming - davew9804 - 06-14-2023
What a life changing event... Praying that it will be most beneficial to your family and that God will direct you to the earthly house He has prepared for you. Praying also that it will be configured so that you and Veloyce can find solace, peace and the spaces you need while also blessing your Son's family along the way.
Praying Blessing and Peace to the Hurst family!
RE: Rehoming - jaybreak - 06-15-2023
Will definitely send up some prayers tonight. It can be a complicated situation when you bring different personalities together, but there's a lot of good blessings that can come out if it.
RE: Rehoming - Ed Hurst - 06-22-2023
This is one of those times when the Lord is moving and you cannot possibly guess what He'll do next, much less when He'll do it.
So that you can pray with some concrete awareness: The biggest sticking point right now is that I don't have a credit rating. For over 30 years I avoided using credit for anything, and it worked just fine. Suddenly it's a big problem. Without it, we cannot use my VA privileges to put a home loan in our reach. We are taking steps to remedy that, but no one knows how long that might take (current estimate: 4 months minimum). Meanwhile, Veloyce and I feel certain we cannot remain in our current apartment. We need to be able to move before our lease comes up at the end of August. Indeed, we have to give 30 days notice, so it's the end of July. And any rental we might take means another full year commitment, putting a shared home on hold.
We aren't in a panic. We can probably find better digs for another year while the credit rating gets fixed. We still have to deal with my son and his family, as his current job ends after this month -- another surprise element. I really don't want them staying in that ratty mobile home any longer, and they want to sell it, but there are challenges finding them another place to live while we wait for the home buying process to move forward. We are doing our best to help, but our resources are limited. One of the complications is that they are being pressed by his wife's family to move in with them down in Ft. Worth area. I won't burden you with details, but that would be like a prison sentence for my son and his family.
Dare I say this? My daughter-in-law is not being very calm right now. She panics easily.
We need some miracles.
RE: Rehoming - davew9804 - 06-22-2023
Life does get complicated... Praying with you for those miracles to occur.
RE: Rehoming - forrealone - 06-22-2023
I feel for you all. And I do seem to recall past conversations regarding your daughter-in-law. Could you all rent a 3 or 4 bedroom place for 6 months? I was looking at OKC and outlying areas (eg Norman) short term apartments and houses and they seem to be affordable if both families contributed. It would be a little tight, space-wise. But, if it was for six months perhaps it could be do-able maybe?
I will continue to pray that the Lord will bless you in His perfect timing!
So glad you are keeping us posted. We are all here for you.....
Love you, Brother!
RE: Rehoming - jaybreak - 06-23-2023
Ed - Does your daughter in law want to move down to Ft. Worth? Hopefully not? It would be a worse situation if your son and DIL were of two minds about it.
RE: Rehoming - Ed Hurst - 06-23-2023
DIL is flighty about it, Jay. Any time I ask I'm likely to get a different answer. The granddaughters are united against it.
We are currently looking at rentals that could accommodate all of us, but virtually all of them are on annual lease basis. Still, it's more realistic than the original plan.
RE: Rehoming - Ed Hurst - 06-30-2023
We weren't happy with the broker in our area, so we went with Veterans United, which had a good rating with investment companies. They worked through a different process. Today my credit rating shot up to over 700 and we are in. Veterans United issued us a letter pre-approving us for a substantial amount. We can begin house hunting, and the same outfit will hand us off to a realtor specializing in VA loans. We have taken the advice to look at those in foreclosure or related distress so that we can simply take over payments (usually lower than current rates). Just waiting on the Lord to show us the place, now.